5 Stages of iGrief

I’ve had a few long term relationships in my time. Some have ended. I understand loss. Most notably, nine years with my Sunfire. It was a good run. I’ve had my TI-83 calculator for about 14. There is a little table I made as a child that I still have, now about 22 years old. And then there is my iBookG4. It’s almost 5. In computer years I think that makes it close to 100. The battery is shot and costs $125 to replace so I just plug it in to an outlet and type away. It makes a weird sound sometimes that rivals the noise of a refrigerator actively cooling (ok, the sound of MY refrigerator actively cooling). I’ve become accustomed to these grumbling sounds and faithfully shut it down each night so it can get its rest. It’s tired, it’s old, it’s failing, and I can’t ignore it anymore. A few weeks ago the screen filled with an error message and told me to reboot. I panicked. I had never seen that before. Thankfully I was with Brian H. (shout out!) who is a Mac person and employee. He also can remain calm in a crisis, or at least in the midst of my crisis. We rebooted. It happened again. I freaked out. It happened a third time and I turned on him, “It’s your scanner! I blame the scanner!” iAnger. We took out the battery and put it back in. That seemed to work. For awhile. The next day I used the scanner again and got the error message later that night. I felt vindicated; it was the scanner’s fault. iDenial.

It wasn’t the scanner. It’s happened twice more in the past week. Last night I removed the battery and put it on my dresser. Maybe it’s the battery’s fault and the computer is actually fine. The battery is poisoning my computer. Maybe a new battery will solve the problem and give us another year together. iBargaining. Maybe not. I can’t afford a new computer! I am trying to save to move and not doing a very good job at that. It figures. I finally have created a blog that I am super excited about, I’ve found a healthy outlet for my creativity and frustrations, I am starting to understand and edit HTML, I have fallen in love with my Mac all over again and now, this. iBook? Why? Why now? iDepression.

Brian – I will probably be calling you soon to utilize that 10% discount. iAcceptance.