Dallas is done

Done being 100 degrees I hope. Storms rolled through the area tonight, none passing directly over me unfortunately. The temperature plummeted finally, the sky grew dark, and lightening flashed in the distance. Tonight I ordered room service, sat in my 19th floor hotel room, and watched the dark sky. I didn't get to see hail, rain, or wind. Just darkness engulf the bright sky several miles away.

Is that my future? Dark and stormy, I'm just not there yet? Or is that my past and I'm just watching from afar? Maybe a little of both. I am going to have to work really hard. I don't mind hard work; I just think my new role is going to have such large quanities of work that it is going to be all encompassing and not much fun. I guess I'll take it one step at a time. This week has been overwhelming but I have been successful at turning off my brain at night. I know there is so much I don't know, so much I have to learn and try to remember, it's not worth stressing over it. It's not worth spending my few free hours at night trying to catch up on work that will only stress me out. It's called work/life balance and I don't care if no one else does it. I'm going to.

Tonight I am staying in Dallas. My room is paid for, my bed is comfy, the traffic is bad, and it's stormy outside. I'm going to bed early, rising early, and driving. Again. Tomorrow's destination: Nashville. Sunday: Blacksburg. Hurrah.

Laughter in the air

I just laughed at a candidate during our interview. I couldn’t help it, she was Anna Kendrick’s character from “Up in the Air.” I think she studied the movie for tips because she nailed it. I’ve laughed at candidates before but it’s usually more of laughing with them. This time, she was completely serious and I laughed, playing it off as a cough…I’ll never know if I was successful in my lame cover-up attempt but she didn’t seem to miss a beat. Wow. I started to ask her questions just to entertain myself. I’m a mean recruiter! In the end I may end up hiring her and she can change our organization from the inside out while learning a little about life in the process. Man, I think I need to watch that movie again tonight.

I’ve been thinking about my new full-time recruiting gig and it may re-direct my career long-term. I can see myself being successful specializing, rather than being a generalist and handling a bit of everything. Down the road I can take all the tips and tricks I know and share them with other people. I’ve often thought about working/volunteering at a college career center or working for an outplacement company. I don’t want to be the one “firing” people like George Clooney’s character in “Up in the Air” but I would love to help them transition, prepare their resume, and decide their next step. Someone with an I/O degree and a strong recruiting background would be good at that. Hmm.

I could do HR, work myself up the ranks, master employee relations, and hold a company’s entire liability on my shoulders. I could do that…then again, I’m not sure I want to. I’ve had the opportunity in my current role to grow and I could have exerted the initiative I saw in the candidate today to take on a lot more than I did. I’ve asked myself a few times, “Why didn’t I seize that opportunity to terminate that employee? Why am I suggesting that my boss handle this situation rather than tackling it myself?” Maybe, it turns out, the direction I’ve been heading was undetectably wrong. Now that I’m moving into a full-time recruiting role and taking on some college recruitment, things will change. My career path is a lot more up in the air, and I think I like it that way.

IT saved my butt and my halo

I finally understand self-sabotage. It’s not intentional, it’s not conscious. It’s stealthy and quick.

Today I sent a huge, long email to my probable new boss about the new job and that I want to relocate in August and that I know I am taking a risk and the position might not work out and blah, blah, blah. I feel good about it, relieved that I have clearly said everything I need to say. I have thought through all of my options and I understand the potential consequences. I feel peaceful and calm. Hours later I get a wonderful reply that only leads me to believe I will get this job, I will move in August, and I can soon cry tears of joy. I end my day hoping for/expecting an offer tomorrow.

THEN – then I misunderstand some instructions from my boss and I send a spreadsheet with CONFIDENTIAL SALARY INFORMATION to an employee. CONFIDENTIAL SALARY INFORMATION OF HER WHOLE TEAM. I know what you’re thinking – how did this happen? Well, my boss said, “Add so-and-so” and I thought she meant to ADD that person to the email conversation. No, she meant ADD her to the spreadsheet. As in, add her confidential salary information to the spreadsheet too not forward the whole dang thing to her. Well, it was an honest mistake. This employee is a mid-manager so it would make sense to include her. Except that…NO, NO, NO!

Let’s just say the past hour was incredibly stressful. I lost some hair and probably a few years. My IT department just saved my butt. I think I professed my love to two, maybe three, different IT guys multiple times. Emails deleted, with only a minute chance they were read. I can keep my job, my sanity, my HR halo, and hopefully, my new position.

HR is hard. Don’t you forget it.